December 13, 2016
Guided by memories and recognition of the past, the present formulates itself reflecting on a dream perhaps. Reflecting on the current moments accumulation of sensations informing this familiarity of time and space. Emotion and intelect are deeply involved in experience being had. Flashbacks conjure up fear, happiness, fateful premonitions.
I sit and I stare. I watch and I look at the ground. For a moment I am moving and secondly I stop to let the impression take place. Overcome with nostalgia, I want to remember when. Overcome I cannot but feel its visitation in my entire body. I ask the question? Have I been here before. Have I repeated a moment in time. Have I lived this moment already or have I already thought this moment out in my life?
Only in dreams does it become unclear.
We walked through the neighborhood and hopped the fence. Walking under the freeway overpasses into the sunset, the smell of licorice filled the air from the wild fennel all around. At a stand still a train on the tracks invited us to hop on. We sat atop the heavy metal, watching the sun go down.
Discovering your edge, feeling the raw nature of fear stimulate your heartbeat. Adrenalin you have come to visit.
I don’t beg to differ with the universe. I want the universe to support me. Hello Orion’s Belt. My alltime favorite constellation. Stars remind me to connect somehow beyond my physical body. Somewhere up there, our lost loved one’s dance in the dark of the night, revealing themselves. I remember you, when you were alive. I’m alive, my memory of you still lives, you are alive to me. Living through me I remember loosing you. When you died. I remember when you died. You remind me that others will die. Many more to come. I’m ready for the news. Remember when you died? Remember when you held on so tight for dear life and the universe snatched you out. It’s almost like the universe knew exactly who it was going to take.
You were so young. You remind us why we are here. What is living if you aren’t living passionately ? The material existence is a mere illusion. A distraction of the soul. When you left earth your spirit lingered. You weren’t ready to go. You were chosen. I miss you.
October 1, 2015
Just when you think you had figured it out, the ego shatters and you realize everything that you knew doesn’t even matter anymore and the best that you can do is live from the present moment forward.
As a teen and college student I spent alot of time wanting to be the best. I was most definitely not the best, but I wanted to do the best in everything I did, and even excel. I challenged myself to the max, taking up a full time schedule completely dedicated to education. Retrospect, my education was definitely signigicant, but after leaving college, I realized I had no real life experience. I had done some volunteer work but had no real idea of what it was like to really work hard for something beyond a grade.
When I was in high school I used to paroose various web sites. One of my favorites was one named fecalface.com. Basically, it displayed art work by artists from all over the world but focused mainly on coverage of the artist community in the San Francisco Bay area. It was through fecalface that I was introduced to Burning Man. I read an article and viewed pictures, and from then on knew that I wanted to go to Burning Man after I graduated college.
Little did I know that I would be accepted to U.C. Berkeley and would be placed in the epicenter and the heart of the Burning Man community once I moved away from home. Going to Burning Man wasn’t hard. It’s as if the universe spoon fed me the opportunity. This opportunity unfolded with first a desire and then knowing.
Attending Burning Man probably changed me. For the better or worse is all in the eye of the beholder. Someone once introduced a concept of perception to me once. You are not just 1 person, but a multitude of people. In your own eyes you are 1 person. TO your mother and father you are 1 person. In the eyes of your lover you are 1 person. So as you walk and move through space and time you are percieved as someone. This someone is percieved by a mulititude of different people, therefore a multitude of ways. Therefore you are many people.
The greatest challenge as I feel a coming of age approaching has been ow to find the sight of myself that I can fully accept and love. I feel as if I am a newborn, barely able to percieve myself. Losing sight of all that I am, was, and will be. I am me right now. There is no was or will, there just is.
Going to Symbiosis this year, the one and only fesitval I attended this year was what I felt to be an opportunity to reset and start over with fresh eyes. The amazing beautiful thing about transformational festivals is the guard that social norms create in the default world is fractured and the true self appears and penetrates out into the ether. However you want to express yourself is neither suppressed nor exploited but given full permision to live and breathe. I found this here this year. Spending a lot of time alone, I was able to face the self that I had been ignoring and pushing away in the default world. The self that I barely could find time to nurture. I nurtured a little here in the safe space called Symbiosis. I’m grateful for all the artists, builders, innovators, and passionate people that made the space so beautiful and full of loving intentions.
What I realized was that no moment in time can be repeated. You can relive a moment in time through memory, but a moment in time lasts forever. I truly felt that the moments spent at Symbiosis were pivotal, communing with nature, the stars, and everyone there that made this communion extra honroable and possible. As a micro community we honored the macro of our universe under one sky, floating in one cosm, shifting together, unifying many hearts beating as one. The pusle and energy generated in a single 4 day festival I hope can last an eternity.
As I embark on this next chapter in life I want to give thanks and reverance to the hard work, times, and struggles that my ancestors embarked to give me permission to be here today reflecting right now. Without them I wouldn’t be here, and for my mere ability to exist I am grateful.
September 5, 2015
I made a promise to open my heart to you because I know that I want you in my life.
I promise to smile more.
I promise to love more.
I promise to take time more.
I promise to trust more.
I promise to acknowledge abundance.
I promse to etch a more sustainable path for my future.
Pocha Pearl Rabye See the Spirits
Hardly shroomed today but was schooled on the state of the pouring dipper over the hazy lit horizon. Above its pouring it’s guidance. Elements contained by the universe: H, O, C, N, Fe, Z, Na, Ca, Pb, S, Si, are rotating amongst us caught by a shooting star. Who knows what sort of matter is expanding into the space we know as empty. Space, Air, Water, Earth, Fire. Guided by the light, the constellations tell me how to find land. Navigation to another realm. The stars tell me where to find water. What does this all mean in context. Well it means that we have what we need to survive programmed inside of us.
I choose to see the glory that is within us all. I choose to see the light. Allow light to be overcome by doom. Doesn’t matter what you know until you start showing it. Until you start trying to believe and just believe.
Chronicles acquired after much sun gazing, bija sound healing, and chakra working with the light. Ignite your inner self. Vibrate a tone that you create. Create a frequency. Manifest.
July 22, 2015
So far, 2015 has proved to be pretty prosperous in the art departemnt for me. I have had the opportunity to have my art up in many locations in the Oakland area and have even made a few sales. I participated in live art at Wormhole Wednesdays at the New Parish and Oakland First Fridays art walk. A few places that I got a chance to hang were:
Tara’s Organic Ice Cream(2014)
Yoga Love ,West Oakland
and coming soon The Layover
I’m so excited to be apart of this developing and vibrant artist community here in the Bay area. I can hardly bare to leave just yet, this place is just full of magic, mysticism, and a catalyst to a higher calling. Really hope to develop my artistic vision and goals more as this year progresses into the second half of 2015.
Currently I’m assisting a mural being painted by artist Alan Leon located on 6th and Madison in Oakland right off the highway.
Your Freind. Its a lovely day in the neighborhood.
I started this painting when I started this blog. It is finally done! This is a meditation on flow of the ocean and how it is heavily intertwined with our land ecosystem. Snippets under the water help us remember that just because you can’t see it doens’t mean there isn’t a connection or that it does not exist. Our lives are not our own.
June 15, 2015
Let it be your Mantra. As you move through the twists turns, swivels, and summersaults of your daily routine, see LOVE. It is eternal.
My quest for LOVE has been rather intensive. As a 27 year old on the brink of Saturn coming back into my familiar orbit as a child, relearning how to LOVE myself has been the greatest challenge yet and the most fullfilling. There have been there ups and downs, chakras opening, closing, rebounds. Relapses in judgement, thought, and action. Regrets and risks taken, so far not foresaken.
Learning everyday to lighten up a little more. Find the humor in life, the healing to explore. In a simple laugh or giggle shared with another. That scornful stare, frown wrinkling across the forehead. I simply iron out, watch the stares roll off the shoulder, become more resistant, grounding not bothered.
It is familiar, the Divine self inside. The light that you speak of is an eternal glow we must abide. This intuition and accumulation of fluttering stomach and sighs. The body is telling me to let it go, say goodbye. Open your heart to the world and its glory. To GOD, to divinity, revel in the story. Of Creation, Of OM, Of universal potential. Of that infinite source, never ending, growing exponential. Just like you the universe inside. Encapsulated by skin surely grows wide. Deep inside I want you to connect.
The depths of beyond want you to trek. Find me space bound, landing on the stars. A portal so distant yet not so far. By the vastness the eye can see, a simple frequency, wavelength has softly touched me. Earth aura, protect, Global consciousness direct, atmospheric dreamscapes activate, awaken the clarity within the gate. see we are locked to our rock. This is our deepest LOVE. What is unknown hovers above. Take root in the soil, in the rock and water too.
Join me on this this journey of ETERNALLY LOVING you too.
This week has been incredibly transformational. Through this I have strongly affirmed my trust in riding the wave to bliss. Literally it has been an intense experience. Its amazing what happens when you start putting yourself out there, even if that is just simply stepping outside your door. I had the great opportunity to hug Amma this week. She is an empire of compassion for the world. A living example of divine love and leadership, making positive strides in the world. Fixing the world with a glue called care. I have also recieved reiki from Chrisite Piko at a workshop at Truve in downtown Oakland. Ready to release and heal even more. I am feeling lighter today, more clarity and more love than ever. I am Eternally Grateful.
Recently, I have been encountering amazing synchronicities in my life. I choose to see the synchronicities, and the messages are delivered once I let go of the moments, meaning and await Source’s diagnosis. I feel very blessed to be able to have cultivated this type of awareness. Sometimes it is more heightened than others, and amongst certain people that share a similar path as my own. Today, i want to give thanks to all the people in my life that have showed up. I’m making a pack with myself to appreciate you!
The path you own, is all your own.
A single metaphorical key of sticks and stones
But you aren’t really broken, you’ve been given wings.
To fly and ascend the beauty within, all that you see is so clear
Visions pressed between palms, collecting in the qualms
Quarreling to a new dimension, Dimethyltriptamine.
Forgiveness is bliss, holding on makes no sense.
be here in the now, you grazing cow.
Shamanic dreams, euphoric visions, giddy pleasure
take the reins of your rock climbing harness.
at the top of your selenite tower, you’ll find and new you.
A cleaned and awakened soul, manifest the color blue.
Because the earth and the sky share a single eye, a different constitution.
3D worlds gone ary. meeting at the horizon. we’ve found our playing place.
How deep can you go within your own palace?
Protect the temple, balance the jumble.
Mumble a bit of muppet talk, and sense the serenity.
My wish for all of you is to discover you are lovely.
Contentment is key. Silence is many things. Words are meaningless. what is true and pure is what is felt. If we can begin to start listening to our bodies and learn how to dispell what isn’t serving us, we can ascend in this life.
I feel grateful today as the Spring awakens my hear to what has blossomed within. A cold, lonely, and dark winter showed me where my darkness exists. In the quiet corners of my heart, soul and mind, I am found. Onward, this journey of discovery is quite simple. Make space to change and refine your frequency. Set an intention. Breathe with purpose and awareness. Harmonize with the Earth’s pulse. Identify the unity. Become one. I am in love!
June 29, 2014
May 11, 2013
There is a beauty in your presence.
In your Life,
There is a manifestation of your life that stays and grows, flourishes.
No one really knows.
How negative can distract, a man from his potential
A woman from her magic, a being from doing.
The best that they came here to do and to see,
I’ve seen how negativity affects you and me.
Like a weight, I cannot fly, my wings at my side.
Drained and abused,
My own self worth short fused.
As I cradle my heart and open myself,
I realize that the gift was to work on my mind
so that my heart could thrive.
Without a joy or vision to see,
My minds clouded all thats pure to me.
Because purity is simple, It doesn’t lie.
Manifest goodness, peaceful things, and lies.
Revel in glory,in forgiveness, in faith.
Blinded by sin, purgatory, and shame.
Co-create, co-habitate, co-ed, and co-exist.
Co-operate, co-work, live, and breathe this.
See the goodness, see the light, don’t hold back,
Shine as bright.
As you need to see down the dark path of empathy,
of what good could be a future for yourself.
Fearless of consequence, pain, and betrayal.
Liberate yourself, accept the unfaithful.
March 4, 2013
After rediscovering my long lost password lingering in an old journal, I’m back to blog, reflect and share some news. Recently, I have taken up Yoga Teacher Training and am starting to focus more inward on my own well being, art, and self discovery. Art has taken a year long back slide for me, once I discovered a great passion for hula hooping as a form of release, expression, and gratitude. Earth worshiping while whirling around, falling to the grass, watching the sun set, digging my toes and heels into the dirt beneath, barefoot and blissful. I hope to start a meetup group in San Jose to bring people together to start hooping it up, and perhaps, after I have successfully complete my Yoga TT, I will begin to offer donation based yoga somewhere in the community.
Life is a journey and a karmic loop all in yourself, the energies manifested, revealed, contained, and released; reforming a destined moment, luckily arriving to greet you from behind. You turn around and what do you find. something of this world, a moment for your mind, contemplate the meaning as you drift and become a person in the now, and being of ONE!
Thanks for being!
April 24, 2012
. E a r t h D a y .
Is this fate snapping in the wind?
i feel the fate of time reaching out to combine,
the complexities of a future placed inside my mind.
No time to forget,
Only to compile in denial.
Send me away for the hands caught in chains
would tell me that there is a ray.
A light that shines, supports you in the toughest times,
Honors courage and your pride set aside.
Lean on the world as you go by.
Find a way to make the most you see,
because you were always meant to be
Apart of God’s heaven
that Holy nesting place,
A spot in the stars surely awaits.
So if you die, or if you are sick.
Lean on the world, find a way to fix it.